~MeNyEraH~

aku lelah
aku ingin mengalah
berikan kasih-Mu Tuhan
agar bisa ku bertahan

~iMmoBiLe~

have you ever walked on a street that leads you to nowhere?
i think i am walking on one..
if only i knew where it leads me...
i need to know...
but i can't say it loud
i'm trapped but i could not escape
my hands are tied and my legs are chained
all i need is a wind of change
so i could smile
and walking for miles


im waiting......

~aKukaH....~

....yang tersalah tafsir?
kembali menjadi musafir
dalam mimpi yang takpernah pasti
tenanglah wahai hati
aku semakin keliru
bila kata menjadi bisu

~GraDuaTioN~

Auckland, 6.35am....

Yes peeps, I'm currently in auckland and had attended my graduation ceremony. I have approximately one hour before I have to shoot off to the airport and catch my flight. *sweating and trying hard to type in a quick manner*

What is so special about the graduation that I'm willing to spend almost RM2256 and fly accross thousand miles just to be present for this event? The answers are simple. The university honours us, the graduands and for a self satisfaction. Alamak, dah ader yang merajuk ke bace statement tuh? ok let me add some more....to meet all the lecturers, friends and of course, huggly wiggly juniors back! (better?)

The university really honours us in a sense that the road in the city is closed and all the graduands have to march their way to the Aoetea Centre where the ceremony takes place. It was awesmoe and cool to march in the city in your regalia, together with other graduands. The people who stood by the road threw flowers, cheer at us and snapped some photos. Surely I can't ask for a better graduation ceremony. Thank God I was in the Universtiy Of Auckland!

However, I cried during and after the ceremony. Firstly because I had a mixed emotion of rejoice + proud + satisfaction. I wish my parents were there, watching me proudly as I was capped by the dean. Luckily Rye and Naim were there with me. They even shed some tears for me. As quoted from Rye ' rase sebak tengok akak atas pentas tuh...dh grad dh akak'. If other graduands recieved flowers, I on the other hand received a pink love shape necklace for my graduation. Oh ya, together with a congratulation card that has a bride and bridegroom dancing together happily on the front of it...hahaha...thanks Rye and Naim. That was cute and of course, hillarious! *smiling*

Apart from the graduation itself, it was good to meet all the people who are of course, close to your heart. I met Sheryll heaps of times, had dinner and lunch with her, even being 'forced' to give a talk to about 75 students teacher. I swear, I almost fainted when she told me that. Eventually, I love sharing my experience with those students, though I received cold stares from some of the students. Anywhere, why should I care? I don't even know most of the students anyway. Some students even asked for my email address and phone numbers as they wanted to post their queries in the future. The juniors on the other hand welcomed me with a heart warming welcome. Nanad and Jenna tried hard to cook a super delicious nasi lemak, Sara with her cool SLR camera who constantly snapped lots of beautiful pictures of me, Teh, who helped me a lot when I wan in need...and others as well...Thank you so much. You guys are really rock!

God, I really need to stop now. Have a pleasent days ahead. I can't promise you readers to update any entry soon. So, till we meet again some other time. I leave you with heaps of love and good prayers. Pen-off.

~HaVe yOu...~

...ever tried something new that you've never thought you would do one day? Well, I did. I did perform traditional Malays and Bumiputera dance in front of the crowd!!! For those who know me..could you guys ever believe it?

Seriously, I couldn't understand how my school management works, but they eventually sent me to a teather and dancing course last week. So, there I was, stood blankly ibn front of the coaches as they thought me the traditional Malays, Indian, Sumazau and Iban dance. It was extremely difficult at first as I had never dance before in my entire live. As one of the coaches once told me "awk ni keras cm kayu". You see, even the male teachers were better off than me at first. Since I could no longer stand the sarcastic comments and decided that I had enough of those frustration stares from the trainers and teammates, I had to kiss my previleage of sleeping on the comfy bed in my hotel room goodbye and practised the steps and movements of each dancing. After much of hardwork, tears and sweat, I finally managed to dance in front of the crowd without any hesitation. Hohoho. It was unbelievably great. That of course, suprised all the trainers and my teammates. Im not fond of dancing though...but when I was sent to attend it, I did it wholeheartedly.

We tend to think that we can't do something without even bother to give it a try first. I am ashamed to admit that I did have such notion when I first stepped into the training room. Im glad that I've learned something throughout the course. Never give up and never say never. Give yourself a chance to explore and experience something novice in your life. If you fail for the first time, try to do it again and again and again. Afterall, practice makes perfect. Think ab0ut it peeps. With that, I pen-off.

~10 WaYS To aVoiD gaTaLNeSs & MiaNgNesS~

It was 10.25 am in the morning. Somwhere in the staff room, a teacher was devising a brilliant plan to avoid the increasing of gatlness and miangness that she has to face each day. She came out with some resoulutions:

(1) Do not wear sexy clothes - what the heck? So far I'd always with my baju kurung.
(2) Do not walk alone- Sometimes it is inevitable for your timetable and your friend's one are collided. Maybe I should put walk with your teddy bear instead of friends?
(3) Pretend that you're sleeping/ busy- Ok, I choose busy for this case. I'm always busy, yet the teachers kept bugging me.
(4)Be bold and tell the teachers that you're not comfortable with them bugging you- Haven't I once said to one of the teachers "Cikgu jgn la gatal sgt...sy tak selesa la"
(5) Wear a "Saya anti Cikgu Miang" T-shirt during sport practice- Bolehkah? Cam poyo jek
(6) Report it to the principle or PK or perhaps, their wives- ..and bear bigger gossips? or maybe being chased with a 'parang?' NO WAY!!!
(7) Ask the students to act as your bodyguard- I don't have to ask. The students were protecting me at times whenever I was outside of the staff room.
(8) Ask for transfer - I'm not a person who run away from my problems though, plus, there's a possibility that I might face the same issue again in my new school.
(9) Get married- *chocking* Easy to say than done. Tak boleh.Ada perjuangan yang belum selesai.

So far all these plans were not effective enough. If worse come to worst, maybe I should just jump for the last resolution, that is....

(10) Tell the teachers that you prefer ladies rather than guys -..in other words ' YOU'RE A GAY'

God, I really can't stand the gatalness but I don't know how to handle this problem. Can somebody shed some lights on this issue?Think about it peeps.Pen-off.

~To MaKe ThiNgS cLeAr....~

I think this ballad says it all...

tatkala rindu berbisik
dan bilamana sang arjuna merisik
tidak sekali aku terusik
hatiku masih beku
dingin bak salju
belum sampai ketentuan Tuhan
hanya DIA dan rasul jadi pilihan


so korang sume still rase kite dilamun cinta?hehehe...think about it peeps..pen-off!